Things We All Hate in Fanfiction & Oneshots
by violetmusic509
Summary: Just me listing some general things I can't stand in some fanfiction and oneshots. My other story of this got removed for no reason, so I'm trying to re-upload it. :)
1. Chapter 1- The Basic Stufff

**THIS STORY IS A BIT CRITICAL, DO NOT READ IF YOU DO NOT ACCEPT CRITISISM VERY WELL. OR ELSE... *GESTURES TO DOOR***

* * *

><p>This is just a quick list of things other people have already hit on- just to get them out of the way.<p>

* means my commentary

* * *

><p>-"I have big crystal-blue <strong>orbs<strong>."

*What's wrong with the word "eyes." Did it go out of style and I'm not aware? Or was it removed from the dictionary?

-"hello. my name is hana geraldo and my mother hates me." or "Hello. My Name Is Hana Geraldo And My Mother Hates Me."

*I think we have already learned about capitalization in like, second grade.

-"OMGS! My like BFF Juliet was like so like cool! Like OMFG! She is so hawt! She's so gr8! HOLD ON BRB!"

* •-• STOP USING TEXTING LINGO AND SPEAK REALY FREAKING ENGLISH! (Sheesh)

-"I have beautiful, silky blonde hair and orbs the color of the most blue ocean. I looked at my amazing, hot and affectionate boyfriend Hayden. WHY AM I SO UGLY?! WHY DOES MY LIFE SUCK?!"

*This girl needs a life. (and a self-esteem counselor.)

-"...and then I passed out."

*•-• Why? (Sigh)

-"My name is Wave Aqua Turquoise Ocean Sea Jackson. I wonder who my godly parent is?"

*Just shut the freak up.

-"i was like omg so when I wuz like going over like her like howse and her hawt bwotha was like u so hawt. i was like so wedy to like make out wif hhim. like totes."

*(-.-) *whispers* please. get a life.

-"My Name is Wave Jackson and I love the water as well as reading! My parents are Percy and Annabeth Jackson! Time to go to CHB and meet Auntie Piper, Uncle Jason, Auntie Hazel, Uncle Frank, Uncle Leo, Auntie Calypso, ..."

*SHHHHHHH! I DON'T CARE!

-"My name is Omega. I used to be Percy Jackson. But then my girlfriend Annabeth dumped me for my brother, John Paul Jones Alexander Luke Matthew Smith**. I am now in Chaos' Army with Luke Castellan, Selina & Bekendorf, Zoe, and every other hero that ever died in the Percy Jackson series."

*SERIOUSLYYYYYYYY? 1) Why Omega? Why not change your name to George or JoJo or something? 2) Why would Annabeth dump you like trash for your brother...it's not like you two fell into Tartarus TOGETHER or anything... 3) ** I have seriously seen names like that. 4) Why Chaos? Can't you join the US Maries or something_ (A/N: More on that later...)._.. 4) Why are his friends always dead? Can't he meet a new friend name Fred who is just another ordinary dude? GOSH!

* * *

><p><span>Some Quick Ones I Hate Before We Go Any Furtur: (See what I did there- look back at clichés #2 &amp; 3)<span>

-High school stories are never dealt with correctly.

)The author wastes time on **Pointless** schedule comparisons

)Don't fear! Every single f**king High School **conveniently** teaches Greek and Architecture!

)There are these clichés...

HAHA kidding. You'll all have to wait for Chapter 3: Worst High School Fanfics Clichés!

* * *

><p><strong>WELLLLLL That's All for now!<strong>

**Comment if you think I missed anything. I will be posting chapters by Characters. Ex. _Worst Annabeth Clichés_ (Which is actually Chapter 2...)**

**ANYWAYYYYYYSSSSSSS...**

**BYEEE!**

**~Elizabeth**

**(Sorry for the intentional Cliffie)**


	2. Chapter 2- Worst Annabeth Cliches

* means my commentary

* * *

><p>-"<strong>stormy<strong> grey eyes"

*CANT ANYONE THINK OF BETTER WORDS TO DESCRIBE ANNABETH'S EYES THEN "STORMY" or "INTENSE"?!

-Annabeth is obsessed with correcting people's grammar in Facebook Fanfics.

**"Percy: i wuv my new piwopwet!**

**Annabeth: *^I *^love *^pillowpet"**

*(sigh) WHY?! *does overused kneeling facing the sky position while it conveniently thunderstorms above*

-Annabeth's boyfriends are always freaking meanies. (I can think of many bad and inappropriate words to describe them but I'll leave that up to you...) The're also named Mark a lot. IDK why...

**"Annabeth smiled at me and said 'Percy, (whom I have honestly only known for three minutes. We've had not even one conversation, just met, and feel a weird attraction for each other. But don't worry, this is totally normal for two strangers.) meet my boyfriend, Luke.' Then they started making out."**

*WHY. Just...why? •-•

-Annabeth is the perfect package.

**"She was perfect. She was beautiful, tough, courageous, fearless, lovable, funny, (ect.)...many more words here..._but to bad she has a boyfriend_."**

* ^(0o0)^ OKAY I'M DONE! AUGH!

-Annabeth dates Luke.

**"Luke approached me and put his warm hand on my waist. (THIS IS ANNABETH'S POV YOU CREEPERS!) 'I love you.' He whispered in my ear. Then we started making out while everyone stared at us."**

*I think they're just as grossed out as I am reading this.

-Annabeth either: Hates Percy instantly or Starts to like him immediately or Is Percy's BFF

**#1: HATE: "Get the fu** outta my way, Jackson. I hate you, you make me sick."**

**#2: LIKE: "He was so cute. His black hair was matched perfectly with his dreamy sea green eyes."**

**#3: BFF: (aka the mega friend zone) "Oh. I'm sure you'll be very happy with Rachel. Not like I had anything planned..."**

*Umm...no..Too Cliché.

-Annabeth can:

**•defeat Gaia**

**•survive Tartarus**

**•outsmart basically everyone**

**•fight like a super ninja or something**

**•get Daedalus' laptop**

**•read emotions**

**•help fulfill tons of prophecies**

**•and MUCH MUCH MORE!**

**But cannot tell when Percy is planning to propose or surprise her.**

*Is she just have a bad day or something? Sheesh. Get yo schist together girl.

-She and Percy always end up together in the most cliché way possible.

**"'I like you.' 'I like you too.' We kissed." (Enough said...)**

*I love this and all, but they can at least try and make this more sentimental... Geez. /(•_•)\

-Annabeth falls for Percy.

_(Must I give an example, we've all seen this one.)_

*At least try. MAKE A LOVE TRIANGE! Or Annabeth (PLOT TWIST) dosen't like Percy after all but instead likes her brother's friend's aunt's niece's grandmother's baby's mother's aunt's nephew's turtle, Marty. (㈴7)

㈃4- MARTY

(aka the man who stole Annabeth's heart not Percy)

-Annabeth has the SAME tragic backstory.

**"My mother, Athena-a successful architect, died of cancer when I was two. Then my daddy got remarried to this evil witch named Stacey who abuses me. Then I got two demon brothers, Bobby and Matthew. They all hate me and abuse me. THE END."**

**or**

**"My mother, Athena, and my father got divorced when I was two. Mom lives in NYC while I'm here in San Francisco. Then my daddy remarried this evil witch named Helen who hates me (for no reason BTW). Then I got two demon brothers, Bobby and Matthew, and they hate me. They all hate and abuse me. THE END."**

*GAAAAAAAA! Stop! /(-o-)\ ALSO... In the PJO series, Athena never showed ANY interest in Architecture... that was PURELY ANNABETH!

-Annabeth loves the color gray and is obsessed with owls.

**"I looked at Annabeth's room. The walls were painted a light gray and there was an owl comforter on her king sized bed."**

*Seriously? Nowhere in any Percy Jackson books does it say that Annabeth loves gray and owls. I mean... can't she love pink and poodles or something?

**MORE QUICK ONES:**

- Too oblivious (Percy can surprise her. (o.0)\ )

- Too lovey-dovey (ick)

- WAY too big know-it-all attitude (uh-HUH) *city girl 'Z' snap*

- Lets Percy be an idiot (What happened to 'SHUT UP SEAWEED BRAIN!'?)

* * *

><p><strong>HELLO!<strong>

**I'm so glad that I have gotten (so far) positive reviews on this story! If you have any more suggestions write them in the comments section!**

**Percabeth & Blue Food,**

**Lizzie**


	3. Chapter 3- Worst High School Cliches

-They always go to Goode.

"And there it was… Goode High School."

*How about George Washington High School OR how's about Justin Time High School?!

_**(I have recently been informed that Goode High is no longer 'cool'. I still hate it though. Thanks Sebastian M.!)**_

-Annabeth surprises Percy at Goode Fanfics.

*There are so many things wrong with those:

) Annabeth is not SO perfect that Percy's friends should have a hard time believing she's **real**!

) Percy is not SO hot that Annabeth has to LITERALLY beat up some girls for him. Sheesh.

) They always hook up in the end (snore)

) Percy is on the swim team

) Thalia, Nico, Rachel, or some other known demigod is there with Percy

) The F***king demigod that they are looking for is PERCY'S FRIEND! (And they still couldn't find her)

Or

) All of Percy's friends are demigods. (-_-)

) The "Then why can't you call her is she _is_ real?" line and then when Percy says: "She can't exactly use her phone." Or "She doesn't have a phone."

*Eh. That's all I can think of at this point. It's too painful to look at more of these Fanfics.

-Reyna and/or Rachel and/or Drew is a wh*re/psychopathic popular girl.

"And then I saw Drew/Reyna/Rachel the queen b*tch of the school."

*Shheshhhh. ByegfrsinwiEFUBIUFBUFGBHI! GET A LIFEEEEE! ($.$)

-The characters are SO exact and precise that you may as well have just read the original book.

" 'I'm supersized McShizzle!' yelled Leo. Piper smacked him upside the head. 'Repair boy.' "

*… \(°•°)/ WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY?

-Normal schools don't teach:

) Mythology

) Greek

) Latin

) Architecture

) Sword Fighting

) AND ALL THOSE OTHER CORSES I CAN'T REMEMBER BUT **DO NOT EXIST** ON MY SCHEDULE!

*Have these people ever even gone to a real school. That would be a great book. Book characters try and survive in the **real** world.

**I HAVE BEEN INFORMED (NUMEROUS TIMES, ACCTUALLY) THAT SOME SCHOOLS TEACH LATIN AND GREEK. WHATEVER. SORRY. SUE ME.**

_INTRODUCING..._

**_REALITY!_**

STARRING:

) Fangirls

) People who read PJO and HoO

) _Real_ Teachers

) People who know they're fictional characters from a _book_

) Courses that _exist_

AND SO MUCH MORE REAL WORLD DRAMA!

-Schedules.

"…then we compared schedules.

**Thalia L. Grace**

Mythology- McGregor

Math- Dodds

English- Blofis

Science- Jeromes

Social Studies- Mayflower

Lunch

Elective: Skydiving- Devill

Free Period

Greek- Brunner

LOCKER: 3345

**Annabeth M. Chase**

Mythology- McGregor

Math- Dodds

English- Blofis

Science- Jeromes

Social Studies- Mayflower

Lunch

Elective: Architecture- Minerva

Free Period

Greek- Brunner

LOCKER: 3344

**Percy O. Jackson**

Mythology- McGregor

Math- Dodds

English- Blofis

Science- Jeromes

Social Studies- Mayflower

Lunch

Elective: Swim Instruction- Possiden

Free Period

Greek- Brunner

LOCKER: 3346

**Jason B. Grace**

Mythology- McGregor

Math- Dodds

English- Blofis

Science- Jeromes

Social Studies- Mayflower

Lunch

Elective: Law & Order- Zuezs

Free Period

Latin- S. PeQuRe

LOCKER: 3343

**Piper A. McLean**

Mythology- McGregor

Math- Dodds

English- Blofis

Science- Jeromes

Social Studies- Mayflower

Lunch

Elective: Creative Writing- O'Venuse

Free Period

Greek- Brunner

LOCKER: 3342

**Leonardo J. Valdez**

Mythology- McGregor

Math- Dodds

English- Blofis

Science- Jeromes

Social Studies- Mayflower

Lunch

Elective: Technology- Gurral

Free Period

Greek- Brunner

LOCKER: 3341

**Hazel G. Levesque**

Mythology- McGregor

Math- Dodds

English- Blofis

Science- Jeromes

Social Studies- Mayflower

Lunch

Elective: Rocks and Minerals- Cononica

Free Period

Latin- S. PeQuRe

LOCKER: 3347

**Frank F. Zhang**

Mythology- McGregor

Math- Dodds

English- Blofis

Science- Jeromes

Social Studies- Mayflower

Lunch

Elective: Animal Education- McPupp

Free Period

Latin- S. PeQuRe

LOCKER: 3348

**Rachel E. Dare**

Mythology- McGregor

Math- Dodds

English- Blofis

Science- Jeromes

Social Studies- Mayflower

Lunch

Elective: Fortune Telling- Gypssy

Free Period

Greek- Brunner

LOCKER: 3349

**Calypso O. Titan**

Mythology- McGregor

Math- Dodds

English- Blofis

Science- Jeromes

Social Studies- Mayflower

Lunch

Elective: Lost Cities- Atlaas

Free Period

Greek- Brunner

LOCKER: 3352

**Nicola B. D'Angelo**

Mythology- McGregor

Math- Dodds

English- Blofis

Science- Jeromes

Social Studies- Mayflower

Lunch

Elective: Ancient Death Rituals- Hadezz

Free Period

Greek- Brunner

LOCKER: 3350

**Reyna P. Avila Ramirez-Arellano**

Mythology- McGregor

Math- Dodds

English- Blofis

Science- Jeromes

Social Studies- Mayflower

Lunch

Elective: History of the Mediterranean- Belone

Free Period

Latin- S. PeQuRe

LOCKER: 3351

'Yay!' exclaimed Leo, 'we all have the same classes; except for some languages and electives.' Then we all headed to Mythology. "

**STOPPPPPPPPPP!**

* * *

><p>*Did you skip over all of that? I always do. I hate reading schedules. Ugh. Do I even need to mention the clichés like: Math-Dodds or English- Blofis? SO overused. (Did you see their electives? HAHA! I've seriously seen messed up schist like that!)<p>

Note: Middle Names (In case you were wondering what those middle initials stood for)

-Thalia **Lovley** Grace

-Annabeth **Minerva** Chase (SO overused!)

-Percy **Orion** Jackson (Also overused)

-Jason **Blythe** Grace

-Piper **Alexandria **McLean

-Leonardo **Juan** Valdez

*I hate seeing this ^^^ HIS NAME IS **LEO**! GET IT RIGHT PEOPLE!

-Hazel **Gold** Levesque

-Frank **Fishy** Zhang

- Rachel **Elizabeth** Dare (SORRY! I just felt like this was the right thing to do…)

- Calypso **Ogygia** Titan (Yes…that's how it's spelt)

- Nicola **Bianca** D'Angelo

*SERIOUSLYY? ^^ HIS NAME IS **NICO**!

- Reyna **Praetor** Avila Ramirez-Arellano

ANYWAY…. MOVING ON… ALSO...

-Having Mr. Brunner, Mr. Blofis, Mrs. Dodds as a teacher

**"So 1st period is Mr. Blofis' English Class, 2nd period is Mr. Brunner's Latin class, and 3rd period is Mrs. Dodds' math class."**

-Character Descriptions are always the same and look like the author got them right out of the book.

**"...stormy gray eyes, perfect tan, blonde princess curls..."**

*snore

* * *

><p><strong>That's all for today! I'll add more when I see them! BYEEEE!<strong>

**Jasper and Flying,**

**Lizzie**


	4. Chapter 4- A Short Cliche Review Request

Hello,

I have been asked by Sebastian Max to do a review of clichés in his story. Here's what I found.

**(A/N: Sorry this is not a PJO Cliché chapter SORRY! *dodges dagger*)**

BUT! This will help you see common clichés that are relevant everywhere. *bows from awesome inspirational speech*

The Wind in My Wings _(A Percy Jackson and Maximum Ride Crossover)_

By Sebastian Max

Comment…

#1: Wow… at first glance this is really well written. I'm impressed.

#2: HAHA. Dam. (Hoover Dam Cliché)

#3: 'beautiful green eyes and dark hair' Typical Percy description.

#4: 'super model girls' PPPPHHHHHH! *dies laughing* (no offence but that's another cliché)

#5: 'time to fly' SUPERMANNNNNNN! (Superman line cliché)

#6: McDonalds (Nico-related cliché)

#7: 'Were you following us' *GASP!* Never heard that one before…

#8: WHOA! WAIT! Leo and (MC) are getting together? (But Calypso…)

Pretty good, but I've never read Maximum Ride… so yeah. I may have missed some, but sue me, I'm tired.

ANYWAYS….

BYE!

* * *

><p><strong>Sorry, my story got removed, so I'm a bit late on updating! I was suspended from my account until Friday. *cries at the memories*<strong>

**Canadian Apologies and Maple Syrup,**

**Lizzie**

* * *

><p><strong>I might actually remove this story because of all the bad reviews I have been getting on my re-upload. I'm sorry if I have offended anyone. Lately, 23 reviews on my story have been greatly negative and I no longer have a reason to put them in my 'lovely reviews' folder on my email. Instead of smiling, as I used to, I now tear up and feel very sad as I read them. Instead of 'OMG! I love this! THIS IS SO TRUEEEE!' I get '...you're coming off too harsh and I feel offended...'. My policy is that if I get three more bad reviews (a total of 5 then) I will delete this story. I'm sorry to everyone who genuinely likes my story. I just do this for fun, not to stir offence. I am sorry to all that feel offended by this story. Now I see why this is the only story of this kind on Fanfiction.**

**I remain,**

**Lizzie **

***I'm silently crying as I write this***

* * *

><p><strong>FROM THE CHAPTER <em>:'(, <em>Which has been deleted. :)**

I know chapters that are just author's notes are not allowed on Fanfiction but I have to say this.

I'm glad everyone has shared their opinions. I am so miserable to see these reviews, I've decided to discontinue my story. The reviews I got are so negative, I cannot take it anymore. Re-uploading was a mistake. I'm sorry if I offended anyone. I will leave it up for those who enjoy it. I hate to have to do this. But, please, keep your nasty opinions of people's stories to yourselves. It feels terrible. Like I said before, five bad reviews and I will delete it and nobody can enjoy my story. I feel selfish, but I can't put up with all the bad reviews.

I am so sorry,

Lizzie

*I am still crying as I write the last words of this story on Fanfiction, the last*

* * *

><p><strong>TWO DAYS LATER<strong>

* * *

><p>Hello,<p>

It's me again. I'm going to continue.

Smiles,

Lizzie


	5. Chapter 5- Worst Percy Cliches

* means my commentary

* * *

><p>-Percy is always so god darn hot! (Excuse my French...)<p>

"There were girls everywhere asking me for a date. I guess my gorgeous black hair, seas-green eyes, hot and tan body, perfect muscles, caring and charming demeanor, good grades, and mega popularity is enough to turn girls on."

*Go get a life, Percy. -.-

-Percy is always crushin on Annabeth.

"She was so...hot."

*STOPPP! CAN'T YOU EVER LOVE RACHEL OR DREW OR SOMETHING BEFORE ANNABETH AND DENY YOUR FEELINGS FOR MORE THAN 3.5 SECONDS?! Geez, it's like speaking to a brick wall...

-Percy is the perfect package.

(No need for me to put an example: we've all seen this one...or just look at my point #1)

*Like Annabeth, PERCY IS NOT PERFECT! Sheesh.

-Percy loves _Finding Nemo or The Little Mermaid (under the sea anyone?)_

" 'What movie should we watch?' Piper asked. 'FINDING NEMO!' Percy yelled."

or

''The Little Mermaid!' Yelled Percy, singing _Under The Sea_."

*Seriously? #icanteven

-Percy is always so stupid

"I nodded along, although I had no clue in Hades what perpendicular angles were. wait mmmmm blue foodddddddddddd. Sorry, where was I? Trigonometry right? No that's not it... 'Seaweed brain, were you even paying attention?' Annabeth glared at me. 'Yes, Aristotle. Very interesting.' I smiled at her. 'I was talking about important dates to remember seaweed brain, ugh.' Oops."

*Yeah, I see this a lot...

* * *

><p><strong>HELLO!<strong>

**If you cannot probably tell, I've decided to continue my story! :) This is not the whole chapter, only a teaser so I could show my commitment to my story. But hey, #hatersgonnahate**

**Smiles,**

**Lizzie**


	6. Chapter 6- Reccomendations

**Hello! I've decided to make a list of five stories I love. Many of these stories are awesome and either change things up a bit or handle clichés very well. ENJOY! (All are PJO/HOO)**

* * *

><p>*<em>The Way Out<em>

By, Forfun100

DESCRIPTION: Jason Grace, Hollywood's Golden Boy, is dying on the inside. With a screwed up home life and friends who just don't understand, he is lost in a daze of 'normalcy'. The only way out is to be himself. But how can you be yourself when someone else has been living for you? Well, you start doing things just to do them. And sooner or later... You find **out** what it means to be alive.

**NOTE: Completed! (With Sequel!- Called Everyone's Waiting, but I haven't read it yet)**

*_Demigods for Parents_

By, AnnabethJackson PiperGrace

DESCRIPTION: Aubrey Jackson thought she had a normal life. Wrong! One night in New York, mysterious figures kidnap her and her ex-best friend Zachary Grace. When the duo wake on a ship called the Argo II with teenagers that look like younger versions their parents, what will happen? How will Aubrey and Zach get home? Will they both get home... alive? (Rated T for demigod violence.)

**NOTE: Is on a cliff-hanger as of Feb. 2015!**

*_Book Cult_

By, A Striped Tigger

DESCRIPTION: It's official. Leo Valdez has the worse luck than any of the other six of the Great Prophecy. Yes he even had worse luck than Percy Jackson and Annabeth Chase, who fell down in Tartarus. At least they had each other. Meanwhile, Leo is finds himself in a different kind of Tartarus. In Olympus, with his family, who are more than happy to read three books all about his thoughts.

**NOTE: Updates A LOT! I'm serious... A LOT!**

*_Hidden_

By, Lilianne Chase

DESCRIPTION: Annabeth is invisible, her classmates don't know she exists, her older sister is a mess, and with her 5.0 GPA and skipping two grades she'd rather focus on work. Percy is popular, he's athletic, hot, and nice to everyone, but all he cares about these days is his mom getting better. Maybe opposites aren't so opposite really, and the most beautiful things are the hidden ones.

**NOTE: Has a TON of Flashbacks and LONG character descriptions**

*_Demigods Revealed _

By, x'TotalEclipse'x

DESCRIPTION: The Mist is gone. Mortals know about demigods. But their not sure who exactly is one. Read as our strongest heroes identity's are revealed to Mortals. In the most dramatic ways.

**NOTE: (That was not **_**my**_** 'their' misuse, I just copied and pasted…so yeah.) ALSO... It DOES have some clichés.. just sayin.**

* * *

><p><strong>Okay. So, I love these books and I hope you'll check them out! If you have a story you'll think I would like (PJO &amp; HOO Only) leave a comment with the book <strong>_**title**_** and **_**author**_**. If you ask, I'll even review it as a chapter in this story. With author's permission of course ! Thanks!**

**Smiles!**

**Lizzie**


	7. Chapter 7- 'Author's Fault' Cliches

-Really Unnecessary/Weird Author's Notes:

"**Hey guys! Just saying hi. Sorry I haven't been on in, like, five years! My goldfish, Mr. Rainbowkins, had just died. It was SO tragic! Anywaysssssss, TTYL! I'll see y'all next year! *kisses***

**~ FartingRainbowFish_RIPrainbowkins Out!"**

*K then…

* * *

><p>-Way too long disclaimers, featuring the characters! Also: Chapters that are two paragraphs long… with a 22 paragraph disclaimer with pointless character dialog.<p>

" **Me: HEY GUYS! I got Leo to do the disclaimer for me!**

**Leo: She forced me! SHE IS EVIL RUNNNNN!**

**Me: Leo do it or I kill **_**him**_**.**

**Leo: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!**

**Me: Mwahahahhahahahahahahahaha.**

**Leo: Okay fine! Rainbow_farting_fish does not own any of these characters. They belong to Uncle Rick! Wait, Who's Uncle Rick? What charcters?**

**Me: Nobody… *nervous laugh***

**Annabeth: Uncle Rick is-MMHM!**

**Me: Sorry about that. Bad, girl Annie.**

**Annabeth: Don't call me Annie!**

**Percy: YOLO.**

**Jason: I'M JUST HERE.**

**Piper: Hello! **

**Hazel: howdoyouworkthislittletinyboxoflights**

**Frank: Hold on I'll help you!**

**Hazel: Thanks Frank.**

**Nico: no.**

**Me: What? Is this 'Nico says no' aka #nicosaysno**

**Nico: no.**

**Thalia: Can't we hurry this up?**

**Me: Thank you Thalia! Bye Guys! On with the story!"**

*#nicosaysno

* * *

><p>-This the normal chapter list of a regular Fanfiction story:<p>

"**DISCLAIMER**

**Chapter 1**

**Chapter 2**

**AUTHOR'S NOTE**

**Chapter 3**

**I'M SO SORRY GUYS!**

**AUTHOR'S NOTE**

**Chapter 4**

**Chapter 5**

**DISCONTINUING! SORRY!**

**UP FOR ADPOTION!" **

* Ummmmmmmmmm… SERIOUSLY!

* * *

><p>-Listing Comments<p>

**"FartingUnicorns: Is this the end? Will Percy remain a unicorn? I'm so confused!**

_**No, you'll get a good conclusion when I finally update next year. :)**_

**Jubillecatt22: When is Peter going to get together with Suzanna? It's killing me!**

_**Soon enough, ;)**_

**KKkitten98: Who's JoJo again?**

**_A monkey that farts out rainbows and curses every other word. He's also the mastermind behind their quest. The Wise Monkey. :)_**

**I3CreepyDolls77: Will there be blooooooooddddddd?**

**_Yes, and lots of it. Mwahaha ;)_**

**Honeybooboochildsux88****: Will I get my Peanna (Peter x Suzanna) fluff yet? When's Annabeth going to be introduced? Who's Percy?**

_**Your Peanna fluff will come soon enough! Annabeth was just a lead-on. She's never joining my story. Percy? Psh. He's SO unimportant! :)**_

**CreeperDude123****: Heyyyyyy honeyyyyyy. How ya doin. You wanna meet me in that alley near that coffee shop? I'll show YOU a good time, eh?**

_**Hey, handsome! Meet me there ;) Even better, meet me at MY house. Parents are away! 123 Apple Street. Apt. 2B ;)"**_

*WTF! (I just made up that last one...) The "story" this goes to is the one below. :)

* * *

><p>-When you see a story like:<p>

"**Percy becomes a Unicorn**** by, Rainbowfartingunicornpeople11**

_**One day, Percy wakes up as a unicorn! Join him and Annabeth on a quest to get him back to normal!**_

**English, T Percy Jackson and the Olympians words: 12k chapters: 11 fantasy, romance**

**MEANWHILE:**

**Only 5k of those 12k words are used in the actual story. The rest are used in the endless author notes. (The Chapter List is the one I put in my previous point)"**

*Seriously?

* * *

><p>-Incorrect PJOHoO Book quotes/ refrences

**" 'PEANUTS!' yelled Tyson, going into battle with his shorter cousins, the giant Cyclopes."**

*I believe its

A) Peanut Butter

B) He is the shortest Cyclops, according to Percy

Grrrrrrrrr...

* * *

><p><strong>BYE! SORRY FOR THE SHORT CHAPIE! <strong>

**Frazel and Sticks,**

**Lizzie**

**(I just made up the users above. Sorry if that's actually your username or you know an author with that username!)**


	8. Chapter 8- FUSTRATING!

-44 chapters, should be over, BUT IT'S NOT!

"…**Chapter 44: And the Story Continues**

**Chapter 45: NYC**

**Chapter 46: Chicago**

**Chapter 47: New Friends**

**Chapter 48: New City**

**Chapter 49: New Adventures**

**Chapter 50: De ja Vu …"**

*GAHHHHHHH! This is why every story I read is short and not 50 chapters long with 5 billion adventures! THAT'S WHAT SEQUELS ARE FOR!

* * *

><p>-Too Many OCs<p>

"…**And, Wren, these are my friends Casey, Joe, Cassandra, Ian, Madelyn, Ursula, Kegan, Quilton, JoJo, MoMo, & Ham.**

**Casey has blonde hair that was the color of the sun and blue eyes that sparkled with a perfect body and an amazing personality. I was surprised when she told me she never does exercise and hates how she looks.**

**Joe was OBVIOUSLY a football player. He had brown hair that was BRWN. SHADE #2234 "Warm Mocha" and eyes that were GRN. SHADE #97987987 "African Emerald Green". He was SOO HOT!**

**Cassandra had bright red hair and deep green eyes. She was OBVIOUSLY Goth because she was wearing a black outfit. She was creepy. Probably gay.**

**Ian was SUPER McSHIZZLE HOT! OMGGGGGGGGGGGGGG! HE WAS SO PERFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF! AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! HIS BLONDE HAIR IS SO PREFFFFFFFF! AND HIS BLUE EYES WERE SOOOOOOOOOO DREAMMMMMYYYYYY! HISSSSSSSS BODDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD! DON'T EVEN GET ME STARTED ON HIS BOD! :D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D!**

**…(insert other useless info here)...** **and then they waved good bye and headed off to Tanzania for the remainder of this book."**

*Wow, author. Thanks for all that useless OC info.

* * *

><p>-Useless Detail: EX. 1: Getting dressed<p>

"**And so I put on my blue top that is in a low v-neck and has 33 rhinestones across the top. It shows exactly 3.333333333333333334 cm. of my belly and is 5 cm from my short-shorts. Then I put on my 79 cm SLVR SHADE #77777 "White Bliss" colored heels on and walked out the door.**

**A NORMAL PERSON:**

**I was wearing a T-Shirt. It was…purple, I guess."**

*Shheshhhh. I'd also do too much detail in _**eating**_… but I'm too lazy.

* * *

><p>-All the guys have a crush on Annabeth, not Piper<p>

"**OMG! Thant blonde is so hot. Eh. Her friend looks cool. What is she? Indian?"**

*WELLLLLLL It's not like Piper's APHRODITE's daughter or anything… (•u•)

* * *

><p>-Demeter=Cereal<p>

**" 'EAT YOUR CEREAL!" yelled Demeter as she zapped out of the Agro II."**

* C'mon guys… really?

* * *

><p>-Bad Descriptions:<p>

**" DESCRIPTION: Anniebeth and Percy go on a quest or else thee world wil end.. Be nice its mye first story! Nno Flwames Plz"**

*)Spelling

)NAMESSSSSS

)Nobody needs to know that this is your first story!

)Does anyone edit these things?!

Meow. That's all I have to say. Meow.

* * *

><p><strong>SORRY FOR THE SHORT CHAPPIE! COMMENT ANY IDEAS!<strong>

**Ciao for now,**

**Lizzie**

* * *

><p><strong>IF YOU WANT MORE CLICHES GO TO AND FIND THE STORIES:<strong>

_***Moments Worth Facepalming in PJO Fanfics**_

**by Chilea**

**(THIS ONE IS MY FAVORITE! I also get some of my ideas from Chilea... SHE'S SO AWESOME!)**

***_Worst Fanfictions on Wattpad_**

**by Ninjagirl13**

***_Typical and Dumb Moments in_ _Percy Jackson Fanfics_**

**by Pandaluv_**

**(All on Wattpad .com No space)**


	9. Chapter 9- Funny Rules & Guidelines

Rules & Guidelines You Probably Didn't Know About

_All rules & guidelines have been copied and pasted from the Rules & Guidelines page._

_All are 100% Guaranteed Accurate._

* * *

><p><strong>GUIDELINES<strong>

_Community Etiquette_

1. Spell check all story and poetry. There is no excuse for not performing this duty. If you do not have a word processor that has the spell checking feature, use a search engine such as to find one.

**HA! Take that people who spell simple words incorrectly!**

2. Proofread all entries for grammar and other aspects of writing before submission. 'Hot off the press' content is often riddled with errors. No one is perfect but it is the duty of the writer to perform to the best of his/her ability.

***laughing hysterically* PEOPLE NEED TO READ THISSSSS!**

5. Use proper textual formatting. For example: using only capital letters in the story title, summary, or content is not only incorrect but also a disregard for the language itself.

**YASSSSSSSSSSSSS!**

* * *

><p><em>Fanfiction Content Guidelines<em>

The chapter system is not to be used as placeholder for non-story content such as author notes. You can add short author notes to the beginning or at the end of stories but never as individual chapters.

**So basically 99% of all authors break this guideline. I find that particularly funny for some reason.**

Entries not allowed:

1. Non-stories: lists, bloopers, polls, previews, challenges, author notes, and etc. **(THIS IS NOT A LIST... IT IS A COLLECTION! big difference.)**

2. One or two liners.

4. Stories with non-historical and non-fictional characters: actors, musicians, and etc.

5. Any form of interactive entry: choose your adventure, second person/you based, Q&As, and etc.

**#1 Was LEGIT! ('o.o')**

Actions not allowed:

3. Copying from a previously published work (including musical lyrics) not in the public domain.

**SORRY SONGFICS!**

* * *

><p><em>Ratings: (What they Actually Mean- According to Fanfiction)<em>

* * *

><p>K- <em>Suitable for most ages (5+)<em>

Intended for general audience 5 years and older. Content should be free of any coarse language, violence, and adult themes.

* * *

><p>K+ - <em>Some content may not be suitable for young children (9+)<em>

Suitable for more mature children, 9 years and older, with minor action violence without serious injury. May contain mild coarse language. Should not contain any adult themes.

* * *

><p>T- <em>Contains content not suitable for children (13+)<em>

Suitable for teens, 13 years and older, with some violence, minor coarse language, and minor suggestive adult themes

* * *

><p>M- <em>Contains content suitable for mature teens and older (16+)<em>

Not suitable for children or teens below the age of 16 with non-explicit suggestive adult themes, references to some violence, or coarse language.

Fiction M can contain adult language, themes and suggestions. Detailed descriptions of physical interaction of sexual or violent nature is considered Fiction MA.

* * *

><p>MA- <em>contains explicit content for mature adults only (18+)<em>

Content is only suitable for mature adults. May contain explicit language and adult themes.

* * *

><p><strong>NOTE: FanFiction does not accept explicit content, Fiction Rating: MA, and the rating is only presented for reference.<strong>

* * *

><p><strong>Did I miss anything funny?<strong>

**You guys see for yourselves what you can find when you read website guidelines!**

**Ciao for Now,**

**Lizzie**

* * *

><p><em><strong>Due to a recent PM, it has come to my attention that I should acknowledge the fact that all titles of stories, descriptions of stories, chapter indexes, author names, story content, examples, comments, etc. ARE MADE UP BY ME! (Unless said otherwise) Just clearing that up. <strong>_

_**Sorry if I used something (ex. Title) that complies to you.**_

_**:)**_


	10. Chapter 10- Laundry List

My Laundry List of Last Minute Things I Came Up With While Reading My Story 

By, Lizzie

-Daughters of Poseidon: JACKSON

or twin sister of Percy or secret sister/brother of Percy

" '**Hi! I'm Ocean Sea Wave Pearl Aqua Starfish Jackson!' 'What?' Percy asked confused, 'I don't have a sister.' 'I was secretly born to Sally but was presumed dead! SURPRISE!' 'MOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM!' "**

*I agree with Percy

-Annabeth (or any character, but mainly Annabeth) is OOC

"**Annabeth suddenly burst out crying. 'WHY DO YOU HATE MEEEEEE!' "**

*Seriously? Sometimes it's good to have people a BIT OOC, but ONLY sometimes. **(OOC stands for Out Of Character BTW)**

-FictionPress

Did you know Fanfiction has a website for just Fiction works? (FictionPress .net)

-Dialog is mechanical -_-

**" 'Let's have a sleepover!' Piper said. 'Yes.' Annabeth said. 'That sounds like fun.' Thalia said. 'Have fun, girls.' Percy said. 'Yeah.' Jason said. 'VALDEZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ!' Leo said."**

*"STOP!" I said.

* * *

><p><strong>JUST SOME POINTS I WANT TO ADD: (But Don't want to go into detail about)<strong>

-)Ridiculous OC names -_- (I think I've already covered this one...)

-)All the demigods join a school at once (that's 7+ people) and no one questions them or is suspicious (I know I would be)

-)Giving you WAY TOO LONG (!) descriptions for a character you already know (ex. Rachel)

-)TOO MANY F***ING FLASHBACKSSSS (seriously... I don't want to see how much your hamsters death affected your 8-year-old self)

-)Where's Grover, Juniper, Lou Ellen, Coach Hedge, Mellie, Chuck etc.? (unless they serve as a plot pawn)

-)Characters curse too much (seriously, like every other word)

-)DON'T GIVE ME AN AUTHORS NOTE SAYING WHY YOU HAVEN'T UPDATED! GIVE ME AN UPDATEE! (like, yeah. I like don't care how like ur computer like broke down like five weeks ago and u like couldn't update cuz of finals or like bother to check ur like grammar)

-)When authors spell a god/ known demigod's name wrong (Tavis and Katey approve as well as Mark-an overused, for some odd reason, name- son of Zuez)

* * *

><p><em><strong>HEYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY<strong>_

**How you doin'?**

**This is just a laundry list of things I came up with while reading through my story a few days ago. I also edited and tweaked my story up a bit to improve quality. Enjoy!**

**Kisses,**

**Lizzie**


	11. Chapter 11- 5 MORE Recommendations

5 MORE Recommendations!

_*Anything Goes In Fanfiction_

By, xXGrayGuitar14Xx

DESCRIPTION: "Anything goes in Fanfiction." Grover said. Nico snorted, "Yeah, I can get every girl at camp, catch you and Percy MAKING OUT by the shed, and can still go to school. Yeah, anything goes in crazy fan's minds. Let's read another one and see who faints next." "NO!" Everyone yelled. Rated T for cussing. Accepting requests for stories the demigods to read. SPOILERS FOR ALL BOOKS! OOC

**NOTE: Funny as H-E-L-L**

_*Mixed Feelings _and_ Lost Feelings_

By, maybeitslaiba

Mixed Feelings Description: Jason Grace & Piper McLean. They hate each other. He thinks she's a bratty diva. She thinks that he's a selfish jerk. They have strong negative feelings about each other. But can there be positive feelings too? Or maybe they're just mixed feelings? (JIPER/JASPER) A/N: I do not own the cover image. Kind of OOC. No gods. *Sequel is UP! Check my profile!*

Lost Feelings Description: (Sequel to Mixed Feelings) *I recommend you read the first book before you read this. Check it out, it's on my profile!* Piper is heartbroken. Jason and her have split. Why? Why did this happen? Will they be able to find a way back to each other? Or are the feelings they had for each other just...lost? {Jasper/Jiper} No gods. A bit OOC

**NOTE: Yep... These are two separate books BUT I'm reading them both and are both very good. Although... Cursing. LOTS OF CURSING. (I just ignore it...) I counted this as one recommendation**

_*The Tragedy of Perseus & Annabeth_

By, 7thseven

DESCRPTION: Percy and Annabeth, who barely know each other, are cast as the leads in the school play. Piper and Jason, who can't stand each other, are assigned as co-directors. They have absolutely nothing in common, but with drama on and off the stage, will they fall for each other? Will they get a happily ever after, or will their fate be worse than Romeo and Juliet's?

**NOTE: Great in the romance department!**

_*Violin Girl_

By, DiamondPheonix12

DESCRIPTION: Annabeth Chase is a smart, quiet girl who has a special talent. Percy Jackson is a oblivious, popular swimmer. Their names were never in the same sentence, so how did they suddenly become so close? And why did Annabeth suddenly disappear? *R&R*

**NOTE: So bitter sweet :,)**

_*Library Love Letters_

By, RockChick163

DESCRIPTION: Annabeth is an outcast and invisible to the entire student body, or at least that's what she thought. After receiving a sweet letter from an anonymous author her life takes a drastic turn. Story is AU and characters are OOC.

**NOTE: CLIFFHANGERRRRRRRR! (AS OF FEB. 2015)**

* * *

><p><strong>YES More Recommendations! If you know a story you think I should read- or you just want me to read yours- leave a comment! If you want me to do an official chapter reviewing clichés in YOUR story, also leave a comment. If you think I should stop recommending other books an only do chapters in MY book, leave a comment as well. I REVIEW ALL COMMENTS! :D<strong>

**Smiles,**

**Lizzie**


	12. Chapter 12-WTF is with These Kids?

**OKAY HI.**

**I'm Going to Compile a list of the ****Most Overused Kid Names/Clichés**

_**PERCABETH**_

Names:

-Bianca

-Silena

-Zoe/Zoë

-Luke

-Charles/Charlie

-Beckendorf (?)

-Sally

_**FRAZEL**_

Names:

-Haylee

-Harry

-Ruby

-Marie

**_JIPER_**

-Jamie

-Jasper

-Thalia

-Sky/Skye

**_CALEO_**

-Christina

-Esperanza

-Leo Jr.

-Juan

* * *

><p><span>Kid Clichés<span>

-The kid has the PERFECT combination of their mom and dad

ex. PERCABETH: blonde hair, green eyes or black hair, gray eyes

*OKAY... I'm going to go on record here and say that both my parents are blonde... and I'm a brunette and my mom has blue eyes and my dad has brown eyes and I have brown eyes... see where I'm going with this...?

-PERFECT CHILD

)doesn't cry

)doesn't give the parents a hard time

)sleeps in the night

)looks cute as all heck

-The child is beautiful at 0-2 yrs. old

*For the record, most babies don't grow into their _natural_ beauty until like five or six yrs. old. Oh yeah, and their hair cant be that long by two... it took my hair 5 yrs. to grow past my shoulders.

-The child has the blend of their personalities/powers

Ex. when one Percabeth kid is super smart and the other controls water

*WTF. It never said you could inherit powers from a DEMIGOD. -_-

-Stupid 'The 7 as Parents' Headcannons

*Holy bejesus... I... icanteven

* * *

><p><strong>HIIIII<strong>

**I updated :)**

**Enjoy!**

**Percabeth & Blue Food,**

**Lizzie **


End file.
